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Screenwriter Smackdown: Tarantino vs. The Coens
I got ahold of the script for Quentin Tarantino’s Django Unchained, and was mildly smug about it till I found out everyone’s read it already. Apparently it got leaked ages ago. Nobody tells me...
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The Hunger Games: A Belated WTF
Today’s burning moral question: Is it bad to enjoy watching a big-screen entertainment featuring teenagers hunting each other for sport? Answer: Oh, I dunno. Points to be made on both sides. How big...
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Mumblecore Millennialism and Me
Don’t know if you’ve ever seen a mumblecore film. Probably not, if only because the term “mumblecore” is so twee and horrible, it would instinctively repel you. It’s a millennial American film...
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The Avengers: It’s, Y’know, For Kids!
If you’re one of the few dozen people in the world who hasn’t seen The Avengers yet, I’ll tell you the best way to take it in. Hit a matinee screening in a theater filled with kids—especially very...
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Dark Shadows and the Death of Tim Burton
Somebody stick a fork in Tim Burton; he’s done. Dark Shadows proves it’s about time he retired and took up a hobby. I’d suggest still photography. He’d be terrific at that—he still has a great eye for...
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Men in Black 3: It’s Still a Good Look
Lotta critics reviewing Men in Black 3 have wondered what was the necessity for it. Who was really craving Men in Black 3? As garrulous A.O Scott puts it, “Can you think of a new movie with less...
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Prometheus Shoulda Been a Titanic Feat
By now I’m assuming you’ve seen Prometheus, and we can talk freely. If not, beat it, because I’m telling all, plot-wise. Prometheus starts out gangbusters, so beautiful and ambitious that you have to...
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Mitt Romney & The Curse Of Joseph Smith: “It’s The End Of The World As We...
The following article first appeared in Punch!, the pop culture iPad app, available free for download here. If you own an iPad, you should read this article at the Punch! app, which has all kinds of...
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Peter Greenaway’s Battle With Visual Illiteracy
From The eXiled’s Australasia Correspondent PERTH, AUSTRALIA — A reliable source tells me that Peter Greenaway’s pseudo-historical documentary, Rembrandt’s J’Accuse, played recently at Berkeley’s...
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The Amazing Amnesia-Inducing Spiderman
The Amazing Spiderman’s a hit, and I just saw it, and I can’t remember it. Which is a GOOD thing, in its way. That’s what loud CGI nonsense is FOR. I mighta mentioned this fact already, that a lot...
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The Dark Knight Rises vs. The 99%
Dear Reader, This whole review’s a spoiler, so if you’re not prepared to handle an all-spoiler review, take a hike. (You know the drill.) Yours in despair, Eileen J. So get this. At the end of The...
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The Best Film List Ever (Not)
I can’t do Best Film lists. Somebody recently asked me to—a former student—it was sweet of him and all—but I can’t. They’re so embarrassing. You no sooner put down a title than you feel like an...
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A KOCH AND A SMILE: Zach Galifianakis is Genetically Inclined to Suck
Published in today’s edition of NSFW Corp: It’s been a few hours since I stormed out of the Georgetown AMC Loews cineplex. I went there to see “The Campaign”, the new Zach Galifianakis “comedy” that...
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Hara-kiri: A Good Day for Self-Disembowelment
I was feeling pretty low, so I watched Takeshi Miike’s Hara-kiri: Death of a Samurai. A movie about ritual self-disembowelment was a fitting end to the week I had. So I was more than happy to sit...
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The Master: Are You Serious?
As soon as The Master was released, every day it was, “Ja see it? Ja see it yet? Whadja think? Ya gotta go see it.” Nag, nag, nag. So to give writer-director Paul Thomas Anderson credit, he’s got...
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Seven Psychopaths and One Pissed-off Reviewer
Seven Psychopaths is one of those movies that’s too cute by half. If I hadn’t been so fried, I’d have paid more heed to the warning signs—the arch title, the “quirky” poster images, the fact that Tom...
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Halloween Tribute: Val Lewton Sez Death Is Good!
In this festive season of the year when cheery death-related imagery like skeletons and ghosts and zombies cluster all around us, it seems fitting that we celebrate someone who really liked death and...
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Skyfall: Die, Bond, Die!
First things first: Roger Deakins is the god of cinematographers. As you know, he’s the Coen Brothers’ long-time DP—your cue to salute—and he’s on the job here in Skyfall, the latest Bond movie....
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Free Me From Django Unchained
I waited to write about Django Unchained because I couldn’t figure out how to account for its maddening effects. But they’ve gotten more and more maddening over time, to the point that I found myself...
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Great Obscure Films #1: A New Leaf
A New Leaf, a 1971 screwball comedy written and directed by Elaine May, is a great genre film made by a women. You know how many great genre films were ever made by women? Well, lessee, there was…oh,...
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